Please pray for me to find patience..
My toddler is killing me.
She throws tantrums all the time, screams at the top of her lungs when she's mad, wakes at all hours of the night crying and won't go back to sleep. I'm sleep deprived.
I'm angry and frustrated all the time because I don't know what to do. I don't have any patience left. NONE. Mommy needs a time out.
Help!
What can I do??
4 comments:
Oh no!
Maybe she needs some special alone time? what is really going on w her?
I am reading 'adventures in gentle discipline' it has some good ideas.
I wish patience to come your way
My 23 month old stops her tantrums when I show her a video I took on my phone of herself during a tantrum. I hope something works soon, best of luck.
I am in the same boat. I wish I had the solution. I give in to a lot of Wiggles just so I don't have to watch the tantrums. doesn't exactly make me mother of the year.
ugh. So sorry Beth. I LOATH the quote...but it's so true...'This too shall pass'. It's so hard to hear it in the thick of the situation, but it's seriously true and her actions will pass.
There are a ton of good books out there. Surprisingly, I really like the Super Nanny book. I've heard good thing about the adventures in gentle discipline and the strong willed child book too.
The thing I've learned from Asher is that he WILL test me at times and those times may be a day or it may last weeks. And the only thing that has helped, is to remain calm, which can be oooooh so hard. And to find a discipline that works for HIM. Listen to what others say, but find something that works for the both of you.
Yelling, screaming and acting tense, will only magnify the issue...or at least it does with Asher. It will scare him if I yell, but in the long run, it doesn't help his behavior.
For Asher, I have found that taking away his prized possestions for the day or taking him away from his friends, works best. Timeouts are OK for him, but he doesn't seem to learn from them. If I take away his music or friend time, not only does it make a huge impact, but we have all day to revisit his behavior because he continues to ask for his possession and I get to then say 'remember when you did this?...you lost your privilege to play because of your behavior.'
I've also started to send him up to his room when he's extra whiny or temperamental. I tell him it's not a punishment, but that I think he needs some time to himself to get his attitude in check.
When I need him to make a decision, I always give him 2 choices. I find that he does better if the choice is in his hands...and I always make the second choice, a bad choice...'Asher you have 2 choices...you can go to the potty or choose to sit in timeout.'...His response every.single.time? 'Potty now!'
Good luck. It's hard, so hard when they learn to push buttons and test us. But I've found, the more attention I give Asher when he acts out, the more he does it. He may be getting my anger, be he's still getting my attention, and that's what he wanted. I always try to remember when he used to bite while nursing. I used to scream in pain and yell at him. He didn't stop biting until I stopped yelling and simply removed him from my breast and set him down. He learned that his behavior no longer got my attention, but rather took my attention away.
I hope that helps. If nothing else, know that we've all been there and it sucks. We're all thinking about you.
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